If Only
by DivergentGirl16
Summary: Katniss and Peeta have been together for a year leading up to the reaping of the 74th annual Hunger Games. Now, they are both facing the games and President Snow as a team. How will this change things, and what will happen next? This story will explore how their relationship changes the events of The Hunger Games, Catching Fire and Mockingjay.
1. Prolouge

It's very early when I leave my house this morning, my eyes constantly darting around as I head to the meadow. It's reaping day, so it is pretty much guaranteed that there will be more peacekeepers around than normal today. I let out a sigh as I get closer and closer to the meadow, reminding myself that it is even earlier than when I normally head out to hunt. There won't be any peacekeepers out now—they like their sleep.

I envy them, their ability to sleep on a day like this. They don't have to worry about one of their family members being sent off to their death in little more than a few hours time. They even find a sadistic pleasure in it. This thought makes me angry, but it also reminds me why I'm here now. Why I'm out so much earlier than my normal time to meet Gale and go hunting.

It's because of him. We normally meet much later in the day, after I've had a chance to hunt and trade for everything my family needs and after he's finished all his chores. The meetings, albeit short, are always the best part of my day. We meet in secret; spending what little time we have with the other, never telling anybody. It's been that way for little over a year now.

But not today, there will be no time for secret meet up later in the day. Not with the, _celebration_, that they would have to prepare for. And I knew that I had to see him now, just in case.

I got there only moments after he did, and didn't waste any time before going straight into his outstretched arms. They wrapped themselves around me, surrounding me with warmth that I never felt otherwise. "I missed you," he murmured into my hair.

"Me too," I said into his chest softly, unsure if he would hear. He squeezed just a bit tighter for a moment however, so I knew that he did.

We spoke softly for a few more minutes, glancing around furtively to make sure that nobody saw us. We planned to announce it soon, to our friends and family. We had talked about it only yesterday and were going to mention it after this year's game. Then we could finally be together in public—no more secrets.

I knew that it was time to go when the sun started peeking through the sky, we had already risked being out far to long. As it stood now he would have to run back to finish his chores on time, and I would be hard pressed to make it to the woods in time to meet Gale.

We both looked around to make sure that we were alone before exchanging a soft kiss. "Only a few more weeks," I told him.

"I can't wait," he said softly before kissing me one last time and running off in the opposite direction. I stayed standing there for a few seconds, before reminding myself of the responsibility that I had and running off into the woods.

I risked looking back at the meadow once before I crossed the fence, thinking for a second that I had seen something. When nothing caught my eye I turned around thinking I was mistaken, but that wasn't the case. In fact, it was so brief that I missed something a hunter like me ought to have seen. There was a small blond braid that was slightly peeking out of a tree—the tree that he and I had stood in front of only moments ago.

**Hello Readers,**

**I hope you liked the small introduction to my newest story, please let me know what you think! Who was Katniss meeting? Who saw them? What happens now?**

**I plan to update on Fridays and probably one other day, but I wanted to give everyone a sneak peek! Also, for those of you who are reading Saving Hope, I am so sorry that I haven't updated in a (REALLY) long time. First life got in the way and then I had some writer's block, but rest assured that a new chapter will be coming out as soon as I can manage it. Sorry for making you wait this long, but please hang in there as I will update it again!**

**-DG16**


	2. Chapter 1

We're running late when we come out of the woods, which is why I am frustrated that our deliveries are taking so long too. It doesn't help when Gale and Madge start to argue, I have no patience for this now and wish she would go ahead and express her feelings towards him.

When I finally make it back home with a warm loaf of bread, Prim and my mother are already dressed for the reaping. My mother takes the bread and shoes me into the bathroom, where the bath water that Prim used is still somewhat warm. I gather all my thoughts from the day while I wash up, and then again while my mother braids my hair.

"You look pretty Katniss," my sister says on our way to the reaping.

I smile at her, and look her up and down. The back of her slightly too big shirt has come undone, so I grab it and tuck it back in. "You too little duck," I say, grabbing her hand any trying to silently comfort her on the way to the reaping.

When we finally make our way there, we are immediately lead into our corrals by some peacekeepers. We were some of the last people to arrive. There are only about five minutes now, so I stretch my head to look around, looking for a pair of eyes.

Gale's grey eyes find me and I smile, but they're not who I was looking for. I keep looking, and finally the only pair that I want to see find me. We exchange smiles, and I can't help but think about how much I want to be wrapped up in his tight embrace again, safe from the rest of the world.

I break the eye contact first, also looking for Prim. I finally see her in the 12-year-old section, she looks so small. A hand grabs mine, making me jump. It's Madge, my only other friend in District 12. We used to only sit together at lunch or be partners in school, but in the past year we've really become friends, talking and sharing secrets with each other. That's how I knew about her feelings towards Gale. I was planning on mentioning something soon, after he knew that I was already taken. I wasn't blind, so I knew of his feelings towards me-they weren't just recriprocated. I squeeze her hand tightly and don't let go, normally I wouldn't want people touching me, but today is and exception. I don't have time to say anything before the reaping begins.

Mayor Undersee walks out and gives a speech on the history of Panem, then a video on the hunger games is shown and Effie Trinket is introduced—this year she looks like this think called Bubblegum that Madge gave me once.

"Welcome, Welcome," she said in her annoying Capital accent. "The time has come again for us to choose one brave man and woman for the honor of representing District 12 in the 74th annual Hunger Games."

She looks around at everyone gathered in the square before stepping towards the girls bowl. "May the odds be ever in your favor," she says before reaching her hand in.

She grabs a slip and walks back to the microphone, I hold my breath.

"Primrose Everdeen," she calls out clearly.

I freeze, this can't be happening. Not Prim. In the seconds it takes me to realize what has happened Prim is already walking towards the stage. I don't even think as I rip my hand from Madge's and I can't hear her cries. I start to run towards the stage, and a path is cleared for me immediately. "Prim, Prim," I call, causing her to turn around in time to see peacekeepers block my path.

I'm gasping for breath now, but muster up all of my strength so my voice will be heard, "I volunteer, I say clearly. "I volunteer as tribute." The peacekeepers get out of my way and I walk towards the stage, Prim is crying and Gale has to come down and take her back to my mother. I walk up onto the stage trying to show as little emotion as possible, still not believing what is happening. I have to be strong now, I am a tribute and the games have already begun.

Effie walks over and puts her arm around me, "What's your name dear?"

"Katniss," I say. "Katniss Everdeen."

Effie smiles brightly, "Well I'll bet my hat that that was your sister,"

"Yes," I say softly.

Effie looks up at the audience again, "Lets have a big round of applause for District 12's very first volunteer," she says. "Katniss Everdeen."

Instead of clapping everybody raises three fingers as a sign of support, I try not to let how much it means to me show. Effie, not knowing what to do, tries to move the show along by going over to the other bowl. I barely register her doing this, as I am trying to focus on not making eye contact with anybody, sure that it will break my façade if I do.

I do however register as Effie walks back to the microphone with another slip of paper. I gasp slightly when she reads the name, but I think it's too soft for the cameras to pick up. I'm not too sure however because Effie glances in my direction slightly before searching for the male tribute who will of course by now be making his may to the stage.

I don't have to search for the tribute, because I know exactly what section he is in and I know that if I look up his eyes will be trained directly at me. I know this because my district partner is him—it's Peeta Mellark.

**I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, even though you all knew what it was leading up to. Please let me know what you think in a review! Have any comments, suggestions, or questions? Please leave a review or PM me!**

**-DG16**


	3. Chapter 2

I finally made eye contact with him as he walked up the stage, both of us trying not to show any emotion. Effie introduces us and then tells us to shake hands. I wonder if anybody notices that we do this for slightly longer than necessary, both of us squeezing tightly to provide some comfort.

We are all escorted off the stage after the anthem by peacekeepers and taken into the justice building where they will allow us to say our final goodbyes. Peeta and I walk so that we are almost touching, not wanting to give anything away. They lead us into two separate rooms and close the doors. I am finally alone to gather my thoughts, although it doesn't do me much good as my mind is still racing over what has happened in the last fifteen minutes. I look up when the door opens and am surprised to see Madge, I thought my mother and Prim would have been first. She gathers me up into a hug, which surprises me since neither of us are really the hugging type. She also presses something into my hand, causing me too look down.

"They let you wear one thing as a district token," she says breathlessly. "Will you wear this?"

"What is-" I start to ask.

"Katniss," she says, "Please?"

I nod my head, "Yes," I say, wondering why it's so important. It's not like I had anything else to bring as a district token anyway. I am about to open my mouth and ask why, but Madge is already at the door of the room, probably trying to save as much time as possible for Prim.

"Bye Katniss," she says, "I know you can do this. Try to remember what you have at home too, not just what you have in the arena."

I blink and she's gone. What did her words mean, had she realized our secret? I am once again alone in the fancy room, though not for long as my sister and mother come in very quickly after. We talk for a few minutes and then it's time for them to leave. I hug Prim tightly, never wanting to let go. "Katniss," she says. "You have to come home. You just have to."

"I'll try my best little duck," I tell her, not wanting to upset her by telling her the truth. In reality, I knew that I was going to die the minute they called out Peeta Mellark's name, there was no way that I was coming back without him, which meant there was no way I was coming back at all. I knew that this would be the last time I saw my sister, but I had to be strong—for her.

"No," she said sharply, almost as if she knew my plan. "You have to promise me that you'll come home." She's crying now, and she says the next part so softly that I almost miss it. "You have to promise me that you'll come home anyway,"

In that moment I knew what I had missed in the morning. I had actually seen something before going into the woods; it wasn't just a trick of the light. Prim had been in the meadow this morning. I look into her eyes, "I promise," I tell her, hating the fact that one of the last things that I'm saying to her is a lie. "Bye little duck."

Seconds later they are escorted to the door by peacekeepers. This time I have a few minutes before anyone enters. It's Gale this time, and he also wraps me in his arms. It's not the same though, it's not warm and it doesn't make me feel safe. We talk for a bit, him trying to give me survival advice, me trying not to listen, knowing that it won't help me to survive in this case. Not when I'm not planning on surviving.

Peacekeepers come into the room after Gale, and they lead me towards the train. I don't see anyone else, which makes me assume that Peeta had more visitors than I did. This makes be happy however, not jealous, because it proves my point that Peeta needs to come home—he has more to live for than I do.

I'm escorted right to the entrance of the train and peacekeepers stand at the doors even after I go inside, stopping me from escaping—not that I'd actually try. I'm surprised at what I see inside. There are only a few chairs, and everything is grey or black, it's not very capitolesque. I sit down and wait for everyone else to arrive.

**So what did everyone think? Do you agree with what Katniss is feeling? Are you excited for Peeta to arrive and for the story to really begin? Please let me know in a review. **

**Also, starting with the next chapter the POV will change around a bit. I'll make sure to say who it is at the top in order to avoid confusion. Who's POV do you think the next chapter to be in? Try to guess in a review!**

**-DG16**


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